Food Stamps Could Vanish Nov. 1 — But Don’t Worry, We’re Still Blowing Up Drug Boats

WASHINGTON, D.C. — With the government shutdown dragging into its fourth week, officials confirmed that food aid for nearly 42 million Americans may run out by November 1. But Americans can rest easy knowing federal funding continues uninterrupted for ICE operations, border crackdowns, and a new military campaign targeting “drug smugglers” in South America.

The Department of Agriculture warned SNAP directors to “hold payments until further notice,” while the Trump administration declined to use a $5 billion contingency fund that could extend benefits. “Those funds are reserved for disasters,” a USDA spokesperson explained, “not everyday hunger.”

Critics say the government’s priorities reveal a disturbing imbalance. “We’ve somehow shut down the part that feeds people but kept the parts that blow them up,” said Joel Berg of Hunger Free America.

Asked about potential crime spikes from millions suddenly unable to buy food, Press Secretary Karoline Leavitt said the issue was “under control.” “This is not a crisis,” she insisted. “It’s a chance to see how much hunger the poor can really handle.”