Trump Says U.S. Took Over Venezuela So Oil Money Can Finally ‘Go Where It Belongs’

PALM BEACH — President Donald Trump confirmed Saturday that the United States’ sudden takeover of Venezuela was motivated by a long-standing concern that the country’s vast oil wealth was not ending up in the correct hands—namely, American ones.

Speaking from Mar-a-Lago shortly after U.S. forces captured President Nicolás Maduro, Trump assured reporters the operation was conducted to help the Venezuelan people—along with several very large U.S. oil companies already preparing to “fix” the country’s oil infrastructure.

“For years, tremendous amounts of money were coming out of the ground and going to all the wrong places,” Trump said. “Now it’s going to the United States of America, and it’s also going to help some people down there. But the big thing is America.”

Administration officials stressed the U.S. takeover would be temporary, lasting only until American oil companies finish investing billions of dollars, extracting vast amounts of oil, and ensuring the resulting wealth is distributed in a manner Washington deems appropriate.

Later, Trump suggested Venezuela may not be the last country to receive this kind of intervention, casually naming Cuba, Colombia, and Mexico as nations that could soon “benefit” from similar military and economic operations.

“We want to help the people,” Trump said, explaining that sometimes help involves bombs, troops, and American companies taking over key resources.

At press time, White House officials confirmed U.S. oil companies were “standing by,” eager to begin pulling vast amounts of wealth out of the ground as soon as possible.