Hegseth Cancels “Woke” Program Personally Signed by Trump, Co-Written by Noem, and Praised by Ivanka

WASHINGTON, D.C. — Defense Secretary Pete Hegseth celebrated a major victory against “woke ideology” Tuesday by canceling a Pentagon program that was actually designed, signed, and promoted by fellow Republicans—including Donald Trump himself.

Hegseth, known for his military bravado, blasted the Women, Peace, and Security initiative as “a UN-style woke infiltration of our troops.” Hours later, aides were forced to inform him that the program was literally part of the Trump administration’s “Look, We Like Women Too” campaign.

“Pete’s a passionate guy,” one aide explained. “Passionate, wrong, and often confused—but passionate.”

Officials scrambled to clarify the administration’s position, insisting the original law was “different,” “less woke,” or possibly “written during Trump’s brief feminist phase.”

Ivanka Trump has yet to comment, but sources say she privately messaged Hegseth a link to her 2019 press release with the note: “Dude. Seriously?”

Asked if he regretted canceling a program backed by his boss, Hegseth doubled down. “Look, I don’t care who signed it—if it has women, peace, and security in the name, it sounds like a diversity thing.”