Trump Confirms U.S. Knew of Israeli Attack in Advance: “We Love Spoilers, Huge Advantage”

WASHINGTON, D.C. — While every other country on Earth issued statements condemning Israel’s surprise airstrikes on Iran, President Trump took a different route: bragging that he already knew they were coming.

“We had all the details. We knew everything. We love spoilers,” Trump told reporters, as if foreknowledge of the attack was some kind of Netflix leak. “It’s a huge advantage, honestly. Most of these other countries are totally in the dark. Sad!”

He then added, “Some people wait for the news to drop. I am the drop,” before motioning to aides for a Diet Coke and a drone strike highlight reel.

The remark came just hours after the United Nations called the strike “dangerous and irresponsible,” and the European Union pleaded for “maximum restraint.” Meanwhile, Trump claimed the strike would actually help negotiations. “Sometimes you gotta blow stuff up before the peace talks. That’s just good strategy.”

Sources say the President has begun referring to this tactic as “preemptive peacemaking,” a doctrine he described as “very advanced, very elite—like 4D chess, but with jets.”

When asked about global backlash, Trump shrugged. “Everyone’s mad? That’s how you know it was the right move. If Canada’s upset, you definitely did something strong.”